As my anger starts to mount, I remind myself to take a few deep breaths. After my head stops reeling, I light on one of the stress mantras (such as soften to the feeling or bring it on) to help me reframe the situation. As I repeat the chosen mantra, my perspective starts to shift. I step back and see the situation more clearly. My anger doesn’t seem so overwhelming. I feel a greater sense of control, and as a result, I become less reactive. By changing the script in my head, I alter my perception of the situation. Suddenly, I don’t feel quite so squeezed in the chute. My feelings toward my children soften. I become more competent in dealing with their behavior, issuing consequences impartially, and defining my expectations for the next trip to the market – all this without maiming anyone physically or emotionally. At its best, a mantra has the power to help prevent these interactions from spiraling into toxic events that create lingering negative feelings toward our kids and ourselves.